I started Scholars in December, where we did the Impossible Goal exercise; and it’s been amazingly fulfilling & challenging, all at the same time. It’s been pushing me WAY outside of my comfort zone… and I know that it’s taking me towards the future version of me that I am becoming.
Currently, I’m finding myself in this cognitive dissonance… where I’m moving beyond person I’ve always been -and if I understand this correct – my brain is freaking the hell out! I’ve uncovered ‘anxiety’ to be one of the feelings I’ve resisted all along in my life… and now it surfaces all the time. So far, I notice it and remind myself that it’s my brain freaking out because I’m changing like never before; and that it’s okay, it’s part of the process!
….and then yesterday, I experienced my first Anxiety-attack. I almost called 911, but I was somewhat also aware that it’s my brain freaking out and called my husband instead who was able to get me out of it with some rational talk and presence.
I have 4 questions around this topic:
1. Am I right that this new splurge of anxiety is my brain freaking out? I’ve never been more aware of my own anxiety before!
2. Is anxiety my currency to the better-future-version that I am becoming?
3. How can I deal with this better?
4. I think I’m at a place I’ve heard Brooke talk about – where you’re holding both your models in your brain at the same time. Please suggest me what I can do in this place?
Honestly, I got a little alarmed from my yesterday’s experience and would like to feel empowered around Anxiety.