Committing to Decisions When I’m Drowning in/Blinded by Emotion


I can’t remember which podcast(s) this was in, but I remember Brooke saying something along the lines of: you alone are in complete control of how you think and feel, but some circumstances, relationships, etc. take significantly more work than others. How do I know which circumstances or relationships are just too much work to be worth addressing or doing work on?

C: I tell my boyfriend I love him and I do mean it. Both he and I describe ourselves as complete opposites. We fight about 2-3 times per week.
T: Is it always going to be so much damn work to manage my emotions while I’m with him or will it become easy if I really invest the time/effort?
F: Indecision
A: One day I start fights thinking “fuck the outcome”, and the next I try to exemplify the perfect girlfriend thinking “I don’t want to be with anyone else, I just need to work on myself”
R: Turmoil in our relationship. Big ups and big downs.

Do I separate this into 2 separate (and opposite) models and choose which one has the preferred outcome?? What if I truly think I’ve decided my preferred outcome and find that I’ve change my mind the next day and can’t seem to keep my decision consist long enough to create a lasting result? Quite sure I’m doing something wrong here, but how can I make it easier to decide when I’m so immersed in so many different emotions? Do I have to address all of these emotions individually to figure it out….?
Thanks in advance!