Control


What are suggestions for letting go of controlling someone else and holding my power. Typically when dating I want to control the situation in terms of how fast or slow we are moving. Right now the guy i’m dating is feeling pressured by me to be in a relationship (he said this). I don’t want to pressure anyone! How do I just let it flow naturally? with compassion for myself!

C: Dating
T: I need commitment
F: Controlling
A; Pressure, manipulate, talk about it a lot, break it off, get back together, controlling, shaming, ruminate, focus on him more than work, talk to friends a lot, give my power away, resentful,
R: no commitment

C:Man i’m dating does not want commitment yet
T: Whats wrong with me
F: insecure
A: shame, judge, try to be who I am not, talk about it a lot, ruminate, try to convince him and me, hard on myself, not loving, hot and cold, Blame him for my feelings.
R: Give power away

– Why do I need commitment: It is important to me for security with my heart and body to keep investing time and energy, I want have a partner.
– Does commitment have to come as you learned or have seen: No, but I don’t know how to put down that manual. or expectation of how it should go based on so much I see in daily life.

IM
C: Man I am dating is not ready for commitment yet
T: Thats ok! If its not him it will be someone else
F: Confident
A: Date him, date others, allow myself to love and be loved, choose whoever I want, not controlling, free thinking, not judging, not clinging allowing him to be him, being my higher self, not living in fear, not taking actions out of fear, being secure within myself, Loving myself, knowing my worth
R: Hold my power and create the life I want