I keep choosing to feel positive directly following an experience and then feeling dumb/foolish/stupid a little while later about the same experience and then judging myself for judging myself. Today is was about a lunch reunion with an old friend and her new partner.

Can you help me uncover why I feel good at first and then choose to be critical?

C: lunch with an old friend and her new partner
T I love my friend and I’m so happy for her and her new partner
F Connected
A: Act like myself, chat a lot, share stories, ask questions
R: Feel happy and grateful

Hours later:

C: Friend texted “Thank you my Dear. It’s because of people like you that I love this city.”
T: She didn’t mention her new partner. He probably didn’t like me.
F: Foolish
A: Think about everything I said that was “too much.”
R: Feel disconnected; feel foolish for feeling foolish. Think mean thoughts about myself.