Current Job

I really need some guidance on getting back on a sturdy path. I am feeling really anxious and paralyzed. I feel so alone and uncertain in my current job and career progression.  Right now I’m the only one that does what I do at my current job so there is no one I can ask whether or not I’m doing my job correctly.

When I think about taking actions to ensure what I’m doing at my current job is correct, I freeze and think about all the negative things that will go wrong like not getting clarification around whether or not what I’m doing in my current job is correct, being told to suck it up that no one ever gets supported at their current job, I need to figure it out on my own.

In the past, with a different employer, I’ve tried getting clarification and I’ve been told that I’ll never progress at the job, that I’ll not be able to learn what I need in order to do the job.

I want to feel confident that I’ll be able to find a mentor or be told whether or not what I’m doing at my current job is correct.

C: tasks at job
T: I hope what I’m doing is correct.
F: anxious
A: my stomach feels knotted, I bite the inside of my cheek, I don’t do much work, I beat myself up by saying that I’m wasting my time here or I need to find mentor, look for guidance from parent’s, I’ll ball up.
R: uncertain about what I’m doing.