My Dad asked for $1000. I wish I could send it his way without hesitation and fear. I only have 5k in my account, so that would take a decent chunk. I have four kids, so I always want to have at least SOME money left in my account for unexpected expenses. I want to help my Dad. I know he’s struggling since my Mom passed away two years ago. But I also know he spends probably $500 a month on alcohol which makes me hesitant to give him cash. I don’t want to have a manual for him and how he spends his money, but – I guess I do. I feel if I give him money, it should only go to a mortgage, food, etc.

C: Dad asked for $
T: Ugh, I don’t want to give this, but I feel he needs it
F: Obligated
A: Indulge In confusion
R: Waste time going back and forth on what to do

C: Dad asked for $
T: Seriously? He’s an adult
F: Annoyed
A: Don’t send $, but then ruminate over it
R: I feel sorry for myself and the guilt I feel. Try to justify my lack of Generosity which leads to more guilt

C: Dad asked for $
T: I’ll send it – but then I could be low in my account for my family
F: Fear
A: Send it out of obligation, still feeling fearful of my own $ situation
R: Waste time panicking

Please help!