This probably starts with Brooke’s suggestion to get dressed and own it. To be blunt I have let the mom/work from home look go a touch too far for me. This shows up in my closet and in my cosmetics drawer. I have workout clothes and then I have the occasional cocktail dress for parties. Not much in between.

Today my dare of the day was to go and get some make up and instruction to put it on. I don’t wear much make up and when I do I feel silly. I was raised by a single dad who didn’t show me how to put on make up. To be fair to him he would have if I had asked but I just never asked. Once staying with my mom I put on her make up and she made me wash it off because I put on too much. For my wedding I went and had a make up artist do my make up and that was a good experience. My husband told me he loved it. I never got good or comfortable at buying makeup or putting it on for myself. I tell myself that it’s “not my thing” and it’s “not who I am” Honestly, I’m just secretly super intimidated by the whole thing of it and don’t know what I’m doing. Ugh … enough backstory.

C – I will go and get myself makeup for a daily style that I like and also get instruction how to put this stuff onto my face.
T – It’s not who I am. I don’t know wtf I’m doing. I look silly with this stuff on my face. I’ll put on too much. I don’t need it. I’m not worthy. People will say I look silly.
F – intimidated
A – I go without make up.
R – I look less professional than I would like.

Intentional model
C – I will go and get make up and ask for instruction how to put it on.
T – I can do this. I’m a grown up. I am worthy of having a make up routine that I like and helps me feel awesome about myself. The salespeople will be happy to help me do this.
F – self confident
A – I go to the store. I pick what I like. I ask for help.
R- I get the supplies and tools to have a make up routine that I like and that helps me look even more awesome than I do without.

I did this. I went to the mall and I went to Sephora. I thought I would at least be able to get a start by myself. OH MY GAWD how totally overwhelming. I had no idea there would be so many brands. Ha! I wandered around and I picked up some bottles and had no idea what I was doing. Then I realized my heart was pounding and I was sweating. I literally saw my hand shaking when I picked up a bottle of something to look at the label. I thought to myself. Wow… this is super interesting that I am letting this situation totally freak me out. I worked through that by saying…I’m okay. This is a store. I can try all this stuff if I want to. That’s why it’s here. Everybody who is here is here to shop. Then a sales person came by and asked if I needed help and I said, “yes. I do.” She was young and cute and had on enough makeup to be in the circus. But I just dove in head first. I said, ” I need some help getting some make up for everyday wear. Not too bold. Oh, and I don’t really know what I’m doing.” She was really nice. She took me to the back and we started with tinted moisturizer and she gave me lots of options. She showed me how to do it all myself and made me practice. Which was helpful, actually. At the start, she asked me what moisturizer I use and my heart pounded again because I was sure she would tell me what I was using was crap. She didn’t. She said it was a good choice. I’m totally laughing at myself that as a 45 year old woman I’m still a basket case at the cosmetic counter. I did it. I feel good about it. I’m noticing a pattern about my fears the dares I’m choosing. That is actually helpful.