Dealing with an addict


My brother is an alcoholic and is addicted to prescription meds. He’s been in and out of jail several times, and rehab 9 times. He just recently got out of rehab again. This time, he actually completed his full time there, which is a positive change.

Now that he’s out, he’s reaching out to me for help. He lost his license years ago, so can’t drive. He keeps calling me for rides to go to job interviews. I’m at a point where I feel resentful and don’t want to help him because of how he’s used and manipulated me in the past. But I feel guilty for feeling that way.

My husband gets very mad when he knows I’m helping my brother, and my relationship with him is far more important to me.

But I also have my mom who gets very cold and distant with me when she thinks I’m not being a supportive sister. I feel torn between what my husband wants, what my mom wants, and my own guilt and desire for safety.

Are boundaries appropriate in this situation based on his past behavior?