Dealing with friendship break-up


A friend of mine decided 3 years ago to put an end to our friendship. We have been friends for 20 years. She said that she asked me many times to see each other and I was not available. She also said that she considered me as her best friend, and that I have “many best friends”, and that my attitude makes her suffer. Then she asked me not to be in touch anymore.

I told her that I respect her decision and the door is open if she wants to speak again. This was 3 years ago and she never spoken to me again. It is true that I don’t spend much time calling and seeing my friends, but this is the way I organize my time today. I also think that her decision is related to some personal issues she has been going through. Today I noticed that sometimes when I remember her I feel like crying, and I ask myself if I should contact her or if I should respect the boundary she put up.  I would appreciate some help with my intentional models.  Thank you !

C- My friend said  our friendship makes her suffer and asked me to stop being her friend.
Intentional model 1
T- It is true that I don’t want to spend more time with friends
F- True, available for my other tasks
A- Do not contact her, accept that a friendship can be over
R- We are not friends anymore
Intentional model 2
T- I should respect the boundary she put
F- Sad
A- Do not contact her, accept that a friendship can be over
R- We are not friends anymore
Intentional model 3
T- She is going through a difficult situation and I want to be present
F- Love, courage
A- I offer to speak again and let her decide
R- I have been a loving friend