Thank you for all of that ! WOW, very helpful.
It does make a lot of sense, and I am living those feelings NOW in resistance to the possibility. Lol, it sounds crazy, but I am! Man, I am looking forward to this mindset not being my reality.

To follow up…
Completing the thought looks like to me:
I don’t want to be older and single and alone – not married or have a family because I will be sad, lonely, and miss out on what life is about for a woman. So many people get married and have families, it is what has been ingrained since I was a girl watching fairy tales. I won’t have that partner to rely on and look out for me.

So then I read what you wrote and said ok…. it could be a possibility, I could end up alone without kids, Yep maybe….
And immediately I tense up and feel anxious. I believe that is not a good thing. How can I feel good about the “yep, maybe”
How do I love my life without those things? Believing that does not seem so easy.
There is my preference to how I want my life to go… and then learning how to not be attached to that preference and allow what is?