Depressed and Don’t Want to Go to Function

I have pretty horrible depression today as a hormonal circumstance, and also have a function that I’ve been looking forward to. But now I just don’t want to go and feel awful guilt and anxiety about that.

My thoughts: I should suck it up and go; I should do things I don’t want to do; I’m a bad person for not going
F: guilt
A: try to justify my decision to feel less guilt, buffer
R: ?

I want to like my decision to just have a quiet night with family and stop the doubt. But I am being a crap friend and missing a networking opportunity, etc. So many thoughts.