Discussion with husband

I had a talk with my husband. I miss having intimacy with someone. He said he doesn’t like to kiss with the tongue. We have sex every 3/4 weeks. When we watch TV, I cuddle him, but he doesn’t cuddle back. I ask from time to time if he wants to have sex, but he doesn’t like to talk about sex, so he said I should be more implicit than explicit in my demands. We talked about it. I said I have the feeling he doesn’t fancy physical intimacy a lot right now. He agreed and said he cannot control it. I said I could have solo sex if he is not in the mood and he said he is ok with it. But, it was not really helpful as a conversation I guess. I could say he felt like I was accusing him of not being the husband I want.

I’d like more physical intimacy and more connection. I was practicing the thought “My husband adores me,” which was wonderful, but it seems it has lost it’s power. I feel frustrated we don’t have sex very often.

C last sex with my husband was in May
T This is not enough
F frustrated
A I accuse him, talk to him, notice all that he doesn’t do
R I create a frustrating relationship

I guess I just have to have my own sex life on my own and don’t try to create more intimacy with my husband because it doesn’t work and makes me even more frustrated.

Thank you for your feedback!