Don’t Want to Socialize

One of my big downfalls is I don’t like having commitments with other people on my calendar. I make them anyway because it’s important to be out and about with people but I do dread them (even though I usually have fun once there). When I think of the why behind this, I wonder if it is because I have to be “on” or because I can’t control the environment versus if I stayed home I could just relax and do whatever. I want to be a person who WANTS to see my friends and family. Any questions or thoughts to help with this?