Don’t want to strong arm this

Please remind me again where to find the info on how to allow feeling, not just resist. Ive been working the stop overdrinking ptogram on and off while doing monthly work and after 17 years of drinking every night (2-3 glasses) Ive succesfully introduced a couple of nights a week i dont drink. I allow urges in thise evenings- but part of what i kbow is i can drink the next night. Yesterday i made a drink plan to not drink for 4 nights… i already felt myself hunkering down to get thriugh this- but thats not what i want to feel like- . I want to allow feelings and be present for all feelings and let them come- not just strong arm my way thriugh it. . Tonight sucked. I badly wanted to mask the boredom, mind chstter of not being good enough, and mind chatter about not being a good enogh mom with a couple of glasses – but i felt the feelings – so very unenjoyable, and i didnt like who i was (other then the sober me- that i liked) but i felt them. But in the past , after a night like this i know i can numb out the next evening a bit, but ive made a desl with myself i want to kerp – 4 days no booze. How can i best be present for this? Thank you so much.