Doubting my voice

I am having a hard time believing that my voice matters right now, and that coaching is the answer. Thoughts I am having are:
– This is a moment for people of color to be heard, not me
– Coaching isn’t the answer
– People should change their A’s

C: Protests are happening in the world
T: My voice doesn’t matter
F: Panicky
A: Buffer with social media (gathering evidence that my voice doesn’t matter while distracting myself from my feelings), Making 0 offers to help, wanting people to change their A lines, spinning out/ruminating
R: My voice doesn’t matter because it isn’t being used.

C: Protests are happening in the world
T: People need to change their Actions (not thoughts)
F: Frustrated
A: Spinning out/buffering with social media, reposting people whose opinions validate mine, complaining to my husband
R: I’m trying to change my A’s (not thoughts) – I’m not an example of my coaching work ($0)

I’m having a hard time seeing my Ts as a Ts – they feel like facts right now but I realize are getting in the way of me showing up to serve. But I’m also doubting that now is the time for me to show up to serve, because I feel like we should be listening to voices of color instead of mine.