Download resistance

I’m having some resistance to doing thought downloads as of late. It’s like I don’t want to see what’s in my brain.

C: Thought download
T: I don’t want to see what’s in there
F: resistance ( maybe fear underneath)
A: avoid doing thought downloads and models
R: I don’t observe my brain

I know there’s lots of negative thoughts there and it’s probably that I’m judging myself and so don’t want to look at them . My rational mind knows life is 50/50. It knows we all have negative thoughts. I know it’s human and yet…Any suggestions to wiggle this?