Dream Job decision outcome.


I got offered my dream Job yesterday. It was fantastic and felt like the culmination of all of my years of work and training and my future focus. I truly felt like this happened out of the blue only after I started SCS and started writing down every day of what i wanted in terms of my priorities. Here is the catch- I turned it down. Again thanks to SCS but I am needing some help making peace with it. This position if accepted will take a lot of my time and I ran my top priorities list in my head and realized that my first priority of my health will end up getting sidelined and this job will take precedence and I felt deeply uncomfortable with that. I have 2 young children and an ultra high professional spouse, so my second priority of my family will be challenged as well. So here are some thoughts coming up for me-
1. If I were in my home country, I would have had family to help, so this dream would have come true.(this comes up so often- I want to destroy this thought permanently!I really need help with this one please!)
2. Maybe I am not daring enough to put everything on the line and just try it out.
I tried some intentional thoughts unsuccessfully
1. I am making great decisions based on my priority list and this is the right decision for me and my family.
2. I left my home country for several reasons and that is in my past and not in my future.
FYI- I have the most amazing family ever- my spouse even offered to return to our home country if that will make me happy and contented in career/life. And my little kids cried their eyes out last night when I came back from the interview(I went in not knowing the other expectations from the job) and said that it was not for me. They have seen me passionately work towards this. My heart broke just to see my family be so intimately attached to my own joy and contentment- it only strengthened my resolve to work on my thoughts on this situation. Please guide.