Emotion of Happiness and Excitement


I’m finding that I am usually not allowing or just reacting to a thought and not allowing an urge for even a few seconds from the emotion of happiness and excitement. I’m finding this to be a pattern that I am trying to be curious about but can’t seem to pinpoint as to why. I would have thought that more negative emotions would naturally bring on OD and OE. It’s like I am looking for something deep within me as a reason to OD and OE out of good feelings (like hmmm this is really weird. what happened to me in me past???). I know this sounds crazy, but what is this about. I don’t even allow a second to pause when something suddenly is happy and exciting. I just go to unplanned drinking and last night a major food binge (which I have not gone off plan in 3 weeks)
Thoughts?
Robin