Ending of Friendship


I have been friends with a person for 4 years and we got on well initially and spent a lot of time together. Since covid occurred she has repeatedly made comments about not wanting to meet me or my partner as he works with the general public, which I understood as her father is unwell and vulnerable. Yet, I have seen on social media that she met up with other people that also share similar professions as my partner.

Since the restrictions lifted, I have repeatedly suggested meeting up in open air parks, offered to take flow tests before I meet her and on four occasions I have made arrangements with her that she agreed to. She cancelled on all four occasions citing being anxious over covid. And I have repeatedly seen photos on Instagram with her meeting up with other people.

It is clear that for whatever reason she no longer wants to be friends with me. I feel really hurt and rejected and also embarrassed that I have kept trying in the vain hope that she would meet up and in the process have rejected myself.

This is the model I wrote out:

C- 4 arrangements made between two humans and one human cancelled 4 times
T – What did I do wrong?
F – Rejected
A – Play the situation over and over again. Dwell on all the things I may have done wrong. Feel rejected, yet still continue to reach out which I feel is out of integrity to myself
R- I feel rejected not only by her, but I have rejected myself and actually left myself to try to connect with someone who wants no connection with me. I lose connection with myself, and I don’t have my own back.

I seem to be stuck in hurt, and would like a model or a bridging thought to help whilst I move away from the situation and allow for the space to support myself.

Thank you in advance for any insights.