Everyone gets to behave how they want

I am struggling totally conceptualizing “that people get to behave how they want.”

I get that we know that is true because they do. And i get we are often disappointed because our own thoughts.

Working with clients and applying to my own interactions with my own family so much comes up for me.

*Does this mean we throw at all our expectations? ( no manual at all)

*i know Brooke has expectations for employees. Can we have a few expectations for husbands and kids? Or atleast for our kids?

*Is there any accountability to others or is it all personal preference? It seems it all being “our own thought work to do” breaks down connecting. I find myself dealing with things a lot on my own thinking there’s no point saying anything. My husband gets to live how he wants and I get to live how I want. With certain things I don’t know how to make this a positive feeling.

*Is abuse just a thought? Should people do thought work to be happy with an abusive relationship? (Many people who are physically hit by their spouse take responsibility for being hit and think it is their fault)

*i am not comfortable with my husband and childrens humor at times which I think is arrogant and demeaning to others. I know my husband gets to do whatever he wants, but do I point out the driving feeling I suspect in my kids (arrogance)? Or do i just do my own thought work abt their behavior?

*Is their a difference between disappointing and destructive relationships? (I think you will say it is all neutral…but dang I don’t want to believe certain behavior is only a problem in my head. I want accountability. )

I know this seems like a lot of different things but for me it all fits together in “live however suits your fancy” vs. Reciprocity and mutual respect of relationships