Examining My Manual for Online Dating


I’m working on my extensive multi-volume manual for dating sites. I refuse to answer anyone who writes “Hi” on a dating site because I see it as low effort and lazy. But yesterday I received a two-paragraph message from a guy listing all types of things from my profile and how they are compatible with his interests.

I immediately thought WTF who writes a damn paragraph like this?! Relax Sir! So, apparently, I have the Goldilocks of manuals where “Hi” is not enough and a paragraph is too much and I’m believing that the length of initial dating site message must be just right for me to respond. This isn’t going to get me too far, so here is a model that I would love to get feedback on:

C: Message from man on dating site that was 2 paragraphs long.
T: Someone who has this much time to write this is very desperate.
F: Repelled/turned off (I don’t know if there is a better way to describe the ewe feeling)
A: Immediately get turned off the second I open the message and see a wall of text. Question whether I am ready to date since my manual keeps changing. Don’t reply. Question whether online dating is really for me.
R: I’m wasting time thinking about how much time he wasted.