I just read that you plan to do a bonus call on kids – thank you! I will eagerly look forward to it.
Learning from you that others can’t hurt our feelings was new for me, and I’ve taken that in to my own thinking in my relationships. I am wondering if you could help synthesize how best to explain this to an older child – by giving him a helpful thought to think in this type of circumstance. You do such a great job of making things seems sound so simple with your straightforward words.
Here’s the context and an incomplete model.
My son was playing first base at a baseball game and the child playing 2nd base (on his own team) was saying negative things to my son during the game (as he told me later).
C Teammate said “You aren’t a good baseball player, you think you are but you aren’t. I’m a better baseball player than you.”
F neutral (or empathetic?)
R No affect on me. Go on with my day without another thought about it.
I’ve often told my kids to “consider the source” when someone is critical to them. I’ve learned that it often says more about the person saying it than it does about the person he is talking to. Just hoping to have some solid, brief words of wisdom to remind my son of when this situation happens in different contexts throughout his childhood – hoping he will internalize them and take them as his own.