Family Went out without my Family


C: my sister and her family and my parents went out to dinner for my brother-in-law’s birthday without my family. They had asked whether we could come, we were busy and I suggested an alternative date. No response. They went out anyway
T: they’re deliberately excluding me/I don’t matter enough
F: hurt
A: try to organize to go out twice – another time. Try to thought swap and think there is nothing wrong here. Downplay my sadness and feelings. But also feel awful. Ruminate
R:?

This is complex as I’ve worked hard to mend a bad relationship between my sister and me and make every effort to be neutral and friendly around her.  However, when this kind of thing happens I feel excluded and like they don’t like me. I feel hurt. I’m trying not to but maybe I just need to allow the hurt. I don’t know whether I should try to thought swap and think there is no reason to be upset.