Father’s comment


I had a lovely lunch with my mom and dad today. At some point however, my Dad said that he and I are the same in that we are like the guy in the movie “Accountant.”  I am familiar with the character and he is a high functioning person with autism. I actually don’t mind the comparison for the autism part (though he nor I are diagnosed with any spectrum of autism), we are both smart and solution oriented. We make decisions easily and adapt quickly if it doesn’t work out right. I look at it as a quicker way to evaluate and get the the right solution.

What has me reeling a bit is that he said I am not social. Repeatedly. He is kind of socially awkward but I just always saw him as an introvert.

I don’t know why I am letting this bother me. I am spinning looking for evidence of both sides. I do really like to do things on my own. But I have close friends and I have no problem networking and speaking in public. I was a cheerleader and an executive/ leader in the hospitality industry which is majority socializing.

Please look at my model

C: Dad said “You and I are like that guy in The Accountant, we are high functioning autistics, not social. You are not social.”
T: He is not always right but he is right a lot- he could be right.
F: concerned
A: contemplate watching movie again, look for evidence I am social, think about calling my friends and asking if they think I am social, look for evidence I am not social, wonder why it’s bothering me, wondering what does this mean, if anything
R: I make him right or act like he is right?

I want to think-
I love that my dad thinks we are alike in some ways.
I love that my dad thinks I am smart.
I know and love myself just as I am.
Someone else’s opinion does not have to change how I see me.