I feel silly intentionally choosing thoughts

Hi brooke!
great title right!? I’ve been a listener from the beginning.
I’m excited about the course. Lately work stress triggers anger, shame, jealousy and defensiveness in me. In the moment of emotion, it feels comfortable and good to be in those feelings. well not “good”, but in a way validating. when im angry or jealous, I feel like I’ve dug my heels into the ground, and I can’t crack open the window of choosing other thoughts even though I’m perfectly aware of how ridiculous and unproductive I’m allowing myself to feel. I need help on where to go in those moments, because my pride (of choosing the more vulnerable route of choosing a different feeling) is getting in the way. by the way, when I’m not in an all consuming emotion, like little annoyances, etc. I’m able to work the model and choose how I want to feel. Any advice on how to crack open the window?