Husband interrupts while I am working. It’s not even something necessary, just wanting to know what something was for on the console. I stop what I am doing, and tell him what it is. He then comes back again and now cracks a joke about said item. I look up, laugh, and then say, I need to get back to work and finish this. He does leave at that. But 15 min later, I am trying on a dress in the bedroom that just got delivered in the mail. He comes in and asks what I am doing. I say that I am trying on a dress. (this was pretty obvious;-)) He says, oh, so now you have time for that!! I say yes. Then, I say: ” when you came in earlier in my office, I was in the middle of completing something.” Although I stayed neutral in my response, I end up feeling bad that I am spoken to in this manner. Also, it’s not true that I did not give him attention, but apparently it was not enough. I should have let him finish the conversation, he told me later.
Here are my models. And, question: when I explain or defend myself, am I resisting the feeling of feeling bad? Someone told me the latter, but that does not ring true.
Thank you.
Unintentional model:
C–H. says “oh so you have time for that!
T–He accuses me of not making time for him when he wants me to.
F–Sad/bad
A–Explain myself, defend myself
R–??

New Model:
C: ” Oh, so you have time for that?”
T: He’s having trouble with my excellent boundaries around work.
F: I kick ass
A: Get even more work done, and rock my calendaring skills and completion levels.
R: I feel good about myself.