Feeling lost and messed up mind

Hi! Can you please explain to me what exactly it means to coach yourself?
Where do I start?

My mind has been a mess lately and I kind of gave up. I want to consume more self-help information but I don’t even know what to consume since I feel like all of the areas of my life are out of control. And by that I mean my thinking about them. I feel powerless and lost. I don’t know where to start and what to do . The only option comes to mind is to do thought download and then models on it but I don’t believe it’s gonna make a difference. Because how me understanding where my actions (which are mostly buffering with tv shows, spending days in bed, having low energy) and my feelings (apathy, lost, powerless) comes from are gonna change anything?

I find myself in a space of complete confusion and lack of hope. I’ve been here before but every time it feels like it will never go away.
I’m trying to help myself by thinking: let’s find the tools, let’s find the way out of this. But I don’t even have power for it and what’s the point if it feels pointless.
Do you think making a thought download and models would be helpful?
How would they change anything?
Apologies for my whining, I really don’t like the space where I am right now (maybe that’s my problem, maybe I should just allow it) but I don’t want to stay here and I don’t know how to find the way out.
I’ll make some models so you have more idea

C: ???
T: Nothing makes sense
F: lost
A: trying to look for an answer, the way out, losing hope, stay in bed, watch tv shows, don’t do thought downloads, don’t do models
R: Stay lost

C: have been watching tv all week, haven’t been doing anything else meaningful(I know it’s subjective but that’s all I can come up with now)
T: I can’t stay here anymore
F: resistance, anger
A: keep staying in bed, keep looking for help, resists actually putting my mind in helping myself
R: staying in the same space

Hoping for some guidance.
Thank you 🙏🏻