After a 9 year friendship where I was over-giving towards my best friend with an internal motive to gain appreciation and not getting what I thought “I deserved” I broke up with my best friend. He lives in another country and we didn’t talk for a year during which I learned through SCS to grow and evolve to forgive myself and my friend and I realised that he can be himself and I can be myself. Then a couple of months ago, he called me up and apologised and I accepted the apology and we agreed to start over a fresh start. Since then we have a lot of calls and things are going smoothly.

Now my best friend is coming to town for a 10 day visit and the first 3 days of his arrival coincide with an online workshop I had signed up to, which I realised today as I was updating my calendar with the workshop dates.

Suddenly, I got anxious and when I journaled about it, here’s the model:

C: My best friend’s local trip is on the same day as my online workshop
T: I should skip the workshop and watch the replay later… Oh no! Now I’m dismissing my priorities like I used to do in the past. I should just attend the workshop which is in the evenings and I can see him in the mornings… but then he’s going to tell me why didn’t I say something when he told me his date of arrival? I don’t have an answer for that! Oh you’re so over thinking this! Oh No am I sliding into old patterns?
F: Anxiety
A: Buffering and wasting time in overwhelm
R: Disconnection

I’m still in that action line and it’s so foggy!
Please help… Thanks!