My husband has a female co worker he talks about often. I know I can’t control him. But it bothers me. And it bothers me that it bothers me. Because up until now, I have felt completely secure and confident in our relationship.

I feel it’s important to say WHY it bothers me, even though I admit to over analyzing it.

-We have been together over 10 years, and he has never mentioned a co worker (male or female) pretty much ever. So why all of a sudden does he regularly ? I really think if he mentioned any other name even every now and then, I wouldn’t think anything of it. But ONLY a cute female? Seems strange.

– also worth noting, I’m not even worried about if he is having an affair. 99.9% sure nothing of the sort is happening. I completely trust him.

So you’re probably wondering “ok, so why does she care if no cheating is happening?” Lol. I mean… I’ll admit, I’m probably high maintenance but…. I don’t want my Husband to be so entertained by this woman. Men hardly listen as it is- so, when he remembers their conversations they seem to have regularly, I don’t like it. I don’t want him to find another woman THAT interesting.

Then my model Changed as the A and R changed after I blew up lol. I couldn’t take it, after another story about her I replied “ok, this is getting weird. You talk about her wayyyy too much for being just a co worker. And you NEVER have mentioned any other co workers other than her. It has become inappropriate at this point and I’m sure her Husband would agree!”

So:
C-husband talks about co worker.
T-he desires her. I’m not interesting to him.
F-jealous
A- blew up and called him out on it. 🤣
R- he doesn’t ever mention her now.

You’d think I’d be happy about that. Haha. Well not exactly. I mean, I do kind of like not having to hear her name to be honest- but I know the circumstances have not changed! I’m sure they talk just as often.

So…. not sure where to go from here. I don’t really see a different thought to put in my T line. My previous actions in both models did not really give me results I wanted.