Fight with a friend


My across the street neighbor and I were good friends. Our families hung out all of the time and our kids are growing up together.
Our friendship started to deteriorate in the Spring of 2019, spending time together became hard, there were fights and we were both trying to make the other meet our needs. It just wasn’t working. From late-June to early August of that year, she did not speak to me. We spoke in August and she told me she didn’t like the way I was treating her. She didn’t like how reliant she had become on our friendship and how I had so many friends she didn’t feel like I needed her friendship the way she needed mine.
I understand these are her thoughts. I recognize that I was trying to control her and had expectations about how she should treat me. It’s now months later and we generally keep our distance from each other which is hard since we live directly across the street. Every time I see her my model is

C Neighbor
T You threw away our friendship
F Angry
A Avoid interactions
R We do not spend time together

C Neighbor with her new friends
T That is who she replaced me with
F Jealous
A Avoid her
R We do not spend time together

I have tried other thoughts like “It’s OK that we’re not friends” or “Our friendship was getting pretty toxic so it is probably for the best” but the two thoughts in the model above still seem like Facts to me. I’m really holding on to the belief that she threw away our friendship and since I see her daily, I hurt daily. I’d like to find some relief from this. Thank you!