I wasn’t called on today, but I got what I needed. This is amazing. It took like 30 models to finally get here, and I think the urge jar helped. I was using it to track every time I had an urge to shop, or thought about buying clothes or makeup. It’s been two days, and it dawned on me that the trigger thought behind the desire to spend money, & insecurity about marriage, is this thought: “I’m not (allowed to be) pretty and I need something to help me.” I did a model on it, and finally feel like I have bust through a plateau. I can now think, “I can ‘go shopping’ inside myself for feelings and thoughts, and can have whatever I f-ing want there without permission from anyone else.” The sense of authority I feel is suddenly tremendous. Holy crap! I’m in charge now!