Finding the result line


I sometimes struggle with finding the R line. I do believe that the more you explore you actions the clearer it becomes, but sometimes it does not seem as smooth as others. For instance:

C: Sarah said, “You love Charlene more than me and that’s okay.”
T: That is absolutely not true
F: guilty
A: I defend myself, I think over the past to see how she could believe that, I try to compensate by trying to show her more love, I think I am a bad mom, I tell myself I love each of them differently, they are different people, I think “how could she believe I don’t love her just as much…”
R: I believe I am a bad mom.

C: Sarah said, “You love Charlene more than me and that’s okay.”
T: I will continue to love them both completely
F: Compassion
A: share more with Sarah, Call her more often, Group calls with all 3 of us more often, Save to help us buy a house together in CO so I can come there more often, be aware of my own thoughts, Know I have been the best mom possible and I love her dearly
R: Create a space of compassion and love for myself.

I don’t know, am I trying too much to change her? I know I can’t. I’d love some feedback. Thanks!