Follow question on bridge thought about parents


Thank you for your previous answer, it really helped me.

Could you tell me a little more about “should manuals” for ourselves, and how overcoming the past?

I have tried ladder thoughts.  For now, I am still stuck at the first on “I resent my parents.” In fact, I have made some progress over the last months, I used to have a lot of anger, now it is more about resentment and resistance.

I think a lot about the past, sometimes I wonder if I indulge in these thoughts, but I am not ready to forgive right now. Even if I feel the feelings, they keep coming back. Sometimes I would just like to not to think about the past for a few month and feel free to live my life.

My husband has had issues also with his parents (but not to the point of trauma and needing therapy), he seems to be totally fine with them and not resenting them.

Thank you