I had this pattern since I was in elementary school: I used to get up very early in the morning and always liked to wash, dress, and leave the house as soon as possible.
I always used to arrive to school early or to work, later in life. Even on weekends, if I have no plans, I just get up and go to a cafe by myself, just to go out.
Now, I made the decision of becoming a full time writer and I work from home.
I find myself repeating the pattern of leaving the house every morning and going to a cafe, having a coffee and a pastry.
With my weight loss goal in mind, I would like to stop doing that. I would like actually to fast in the morning, so going to a cafe has to stop.
I tried to switch going to a cafe with exercising and it feels nice and ambitious for a week and then it feels like a chore. Sitting in a Cafe sounds much better. And I can understand my brain’s bias towards sitting and eating sugary food vs. expanding energy in the gym.
I also try to let go of the fact that I used to leave the house all my life. I am thinking now, ‘So what? I did it then because it served me for whatever reason or because I had no awareness. Now I do. And I don’t like the result it gives me.’
Is my work here to switch to another activity or to treat it like an urge and each morning that I have the urge to go outside, stay with the urge and forbid myself to do that?