good moment

So today I had a coaching session for which I prepared really good.
and afterwards I also did some thinking and found out following:

When I feel the indifference towards my boyfriend I immediately try to overplay it or avoid it or resist it.
In the coaching session today, we noticed that I’m scared of going after the thought that causes me this indifference sometimes.
And now I’ve found out that the reason I’m scared of going after it and seeing it in the eye is that if it will feel so true that my brain will get me to break up. Like it will convince me. When I feel the whole thought with my whole body and feel like its the truth and it drives me to break up because I believe the thought.

That’s why I’m resisting.

I already have a thought that helped me before
“even if it feels like its the truth it doesn’t mean it is.”

At the moment I feel really calm because I know I love him and I know I want to be with him and I know I’m in control. And as soon as I figured out how to feel all this. I can change it.

But I’m still resisting.
I can see myself finding out and then crying because it feels so true and then moving to the action of breaking up.

Can you help me get out my resistance mode?

Thank you so much coaches. I really appreciate it!