I have let go of a lot of buffering habits and integrated new habits that serve me. I’m so proud of myself and it’s paying off. However, since I have quit some habits, I am confronted with more negative emotions that I want to process, yet sometimes I just forget in certain situations.
I am not sure if I just cover up my urges by indulging in self pity or what I’m doing. The result I create is not seeing how far I’ve come, forgetting my why, not taking joy in all the other pleasures of life and very little gratitude – which I totally also see, just not in the moment.
T: There are no interesting people and this is so boring (I use to drink and I don’t do that anymore so now I actually have to make my own fun without drinking)
T: Life is so boring and limited
F: Bored, indifferent, frustrated, I am so restricted
A: Eat lots of chips, complain to my closest friends about how there is no point of me being here, go on social media at the party, go home and stay up late searching for some ‘kick’
R: Not enjoy the party or my weekends
C: Sticking to a budget (I am investing most of my money in my business, which means I choose to invest 120 dollars for socializing)
T: I am so deprived of life’s pleasure.
T: I can’t eat out with friends every week.
T: I haven’t shopped in over a year.
T: This sacrifice is so hard.
F: self pity, frustration
A: Sulk, wallow
R: Not enjoy life
I know why I am doing this and I love my reasons. I know I can handle it but I would like feedback in terms of creating more awareness when I indulge in these self pity emotions. It sneaks up on me and then by the time I realize it, I have eaten the whole bowl of chips, stayed up late, or forgotten to truly enjoy time with my friends.