handling doubts and insecurity


Today we had usual technical discussion about a project (that I’m leading) at work.

My model
C: tech discussion
T: Y (who is working with me on the project) had better ideas than me
F: doubt
A: Spinning thoughts – this would affect my promotion. As a lead I’m supposed to have the best ideas. They look for tech competency while promoting, if the best tech ideas don’t come from me, they won’t promote me. As a lead, I need to give ideas and others implement. It shouldn’t be other way around.
Cry and vent with husband that I couldn’t come up with those ideas,.
R: I don’t value the ideas that I bring to the table (my brain strongly believes that my ideas are inferior than others so it says how can I ever value mine)

Should I be questioning my thoughts if they are true? If I do, my brain says – hell yeah. Then I go into
How can I be better than Y (this thought is not useful)

I often get into this spiral of – everybody else is better, faster, brighter than me. How would you handle this when you brain believes them so hard?