Hating myself pattern


I counted how many times I thought the sentence “I hate myself” today – it was around 40. Can you provide feedback on these models? I think I try to change the past and change myself to be “better” by hating on myself.

UM
C: email said ever since their website launched, their traffic has been down
T: omg I hate myself
F: self-loathing
A: ruminate about being fired, quitting, how this is my fault, try to find evidence that it wasn’t my fault. Check to see if my colleague replied to the email. Step away from the computer. My face gets hot, my thoughts are racing. I stop working on my project. My brain loops on “I hate myself”
R: I hate my thoughts

IM
C: same
T: I have myself
F: present
A: remind myself that I have me whatever happens. Watch my thoughts and feelings. Get curious about why it might have happened.
R: I do have myself