Heaviness in life.


I notice that I feel a low level dread and sadness often, it seems like more than 50% of the time. If I were to guess I would say 90% of my life feels this way. There isn’t a reason for it; my life isn’t bad. I do thought downloads and self coaching every day and notice that a lot of my thoughts are negative, but a lot of them aren’t (50/50).

I believe the world is good, people are good, things are always for me, and I am in charge of my life. These beliefs feel neutral and grounded. The negative thoughts are usually about worthiness and judgment toward myself. I see them and know they are thoughts and work on them one by one. I’ve made a lot of progress and see many benefits in my life, and yet the heaviness is still there most of the time.

I seem to be always working to lighten this load, it feels like daily maintenance required to just get out of bed.