My brother recently stopped drinking (good thing), but this seems to have made his manic-bipolar type actions even worse. He lost his job and is making terrible financial decisions. He spends any money that he gets from odd jobs on worthless items that overflow his house and yard. His erratic behavior worries our parents and has alienated his teenage daughter who lives with her mom.

I have seen through your live-coaching with others that I can’t change his behavior and that this is the life that he is meant to live.
That I need to control my thoughts, have compassion for him, and live the life that I am supposed to live. I get that.

But, where do I draw the line on trying to help him? I really think he needs some guidance and probably some professional mental help. I have been meeting with him to help with his finances and job search, but this is clearly over my pay grade. He keeps making the same mistakes. He just spent his entire unemployment check on clearance Christmas items, instead of paying his overdue utility bill.

I know that I shouldn’t try to change him and I don’t really want to change the kind, considerate, unique person that he is. I just wish that he would keep it between the ditches and pay his bills, stop hoarding, stop opening new credit card accounts, and stay out of the legal system – all things that I can see are causing him a lot of long-term issues.

Should I just leave him alone to live his life and his journey, knowing that it is just different from the way that it could be, while I live mine? Should I try to force the issue and get him some professional help?