Help with Model

I’m looking for some help with models. I often find that I struggle to make what I do that day connect up with my future and goals and I feel that what I do is optional/ doesn’t matter (all thoughts). I’m trying to practice thoughts that really drive action and get past feeling lethargic or unmotivated. I am doing thought work but I feel like I’m still trying to convince myself that I DO want to do things and it DOES matter. I feel like I’m driving with the breaks on and haven’t quite got to the bottom of it. Example:
C day ahead
T it doesn’t matter what I do
F flat, numb
A buffer, don’t go after anything
R my life doesn’t matter
C day ahead
T I am already living my future
F responsible
A plan actions and carry them out
R have a future