Hello! I need some help with a model and would appreciate your feedback.
My husband knows that I am not eating flour or sugar. He brought me home a piece of cake a few weeks ago and I declined to eat it. He went ahead and ate it and later talked about how good it was. This last weekend I told him how good I feel off of sugar and flour. We each have a long history of weight loss and weight gain in our relationship. When I was at my ideal weight he had an emotional affair and later said that he was jealous of my weight loss and that he needed a female companion to talk to. This is one of the limiting beliefs that keeps coming up for me and I am working on : “I can be healthy or I can stay married”. I turn it around to “I can only fully be in a marriage if I am healthy” and “I can only be my true self if I am healthy”.
Tonight he brought home a piece of cake for me from my favorite bakery. I would like to feel into the urge and be appreciate of his effort but I am sad and frustrated.
Here is my model
C He brought me home a piece of cake.
T He doesn’t listen; he is sabotaging my weight loss.
F Fear, anger, sadness
A Throw out the cake and feel the urge
R Stay on protocol but I am angry with him.
C He brought me a piece of cake
T I am feeling volatile now and thats okay
R I am feeling the feeling – stay on protocol
Is this a situation where you just feel the feeling? Is it so hot for me because I have not worked through other thoughts about my marriage?
Many thanks for your feedback!