Help With My Intentional Model


My sister and I had a conversation that triggered some old feelings in me. She has a bold personality and sometimes says things and my feelings are hurt. How can I reframe my thoughts so I’m not so affected?

Here’s my unintentional model

C: My sister responded to me telling her that I put chicken in the pan with the broccoli that was already cooking. She said, “That’s disgusting” and “who would do that?”

T: she’s annoyed by me and thinks I’m stupid.

F: Hurt/ embarrassed

A: laugh like nothing is wrong. Shut down. Become passive aggressive and be short and want to get off the phone without explaining. Want to hurt her by telling her I won’t be reaching out and don’t feel safe talking to her. Then think it’s my fault and I have shit to deal with. I’m over-sensitive.

R: I will hold a resentment and continue to take things she says personally.