I have recognized that I have a difficult time letting go of the past. Something will happen in the present that reminds me of the past and my mind is off to the races comparing this moment to the past and dragging the past into the present.
My current situation is with our new dog. He is 9 months old now and being destructive in our home. Last night my husband was frustrated with the dog and said he would consider giving him up. This triggered the past for me because the same thing happened 4 years ago with our other dog. My husband got angry with the dogs behavior so I stepped in, paid for a trainer myself, worked alone training the dog and now she’s awesome.
My unintentional model is
C – John said he may want to give Murphy away
T – This is reminding me of the time he said the same thing about Shamrock
F – upset
A – Dwell on the past; want to remind him of the past; relive the past in my mind; drag the past into the present
R – The past stays in the present in my mind
I guess that the past is really just a thought I choose to think about? And if I don’t want to keep bringing it into the present, then there’s nothing stopping me from having “selective amnesia” whenever my brain wants to bring up the past.
I would love some help letting go of the past in this situation and in many other situations.