Holding your intentional thoughts

So, my second month in Scholars and my first question here. Forcing myself to do it as I know I can be reluctant to participate in these things, do my learning process ‘alone’… and then not learn / complete things properly.

But some of the fails I had set myself for Q1 were things like: do the SCS daily work, actively make use of all the SCS help, stop overthinking and start taking the actions I have planned… and whilst I have been good at the first point there, the latter two are still a work in progress! But I’m trying 😉.

My question: I am doing the models, and can clearly determine an intentional, positive thought (and sometimes this is just a simple, bridging thought that takes me on the right path) – but I don’t hold it clearly in my mind throughout each day. Some days I do the work in the morning, then put it down and forget about it… other days it stays with me for longer.

I frequently get half way through an activity and then find I go into ‘automatic’ mode and just act how I always have. Often I don’t even realise this until afterwards, when I have time to reflect on things. In some ways this feels like an improvement (ie at least there was no ongoing inner critic berating me – that is the kind of thing I do notice – so progress!), but I would like to be aware – at some level at least – of who I want to be all the time. Am I right in thinking this should improve the more I work on it?

I think the answer is yes, but wanted to check! And any suggestions to help me along would be very welcome 😊