My husband and I have had rough few years, but we have worked through a lot of things and are taking it one step at a time. One thing is I do not feel the love he says he has for me. I have told him multiple times what my love language is, and how I would feel the love he says he has for me.
This afternoon we were at lunch. It is July 4. I looked at him and said, “oh wow, today was our first date 22 years ago!” He said “that’s a long time ago.” I replied, “Yes, and it’s been the best 22 years of my life.”
His response, although with a smile, was “well then your first 22 years must have been pretty crappy.”
I was crushed. He knew it would be upsetting to me, yet he said this and it was the perfect opportunity for him to express his love for me. I honestly did not know how to respond. After a pause, I put my cup down with more force than necessary, and he said “see, you just get all upset.”
How could I not be upset, though? His response to the previous 22 years of my life being crappy was not followed with an “I’m kidding,” or “I love you so much” or anything that was redeeming. It was just left in the air, scalding my mind and heart.
Can you please help me work through this? How do I feel better about this? I am translating this statement he made as hurtful and painful. I don’t really see how to translate it any other way that could cause a good result.
Thank you so much.
Got an idea for us at Scholars? Tell Us Here
Looking for private coaching? Schedule your coaching session now
Copyright 2022 – The Life Coach School – All Rights Reserved | Terms | Privacy Policy