Dear Brooke—

I’m struggling with setting 2-week increment Do Goals for my two big 90-day goals, which are to:

1) increase my self confidence/believe in myself/get in alignment with my own integrity
2) decrease people pleasing/caring what others think

So the overall theme here is improving my relationship with myself.

When I visualize success this looks like:
• I’m comfortable with who I am at work and my values are more important than being liked.
• I’m focused on my “tribe” and those relationships more than pleasing everyone I come into contact with.
• I’m regularly using the model to create new thoughts. I’m deciding what to think and what I believe.
• I set non-emotional boundaries based on my values from a place of abundance.
• I focus on adding value at work, not on impressing others. Should I also be focusing on increasing my substance so I can add more value?
• I’m comfortable with negative emotion. I can handle any negative emotion that arises.
• I share my goals with my trusted tribe to make the goal more real and for accountability.
• I plan for cognitive dissonance and am prepared to meet it head on.

I get stuck when I try to create 2-week increment goals because many of these seem like things I should start and do the entire 90 days.

My ideas are:
Do daily Watcher lists (noticing negative thoughts/emotions, people pleasing and seeking approval behaviors)
Create minimum baseline goals and keep commitments to myself. (This already seems to be helping).
Set aside time daily to get comfortable with negative emotion. I could do the daily Watcher exercise noting negative emotion; Ask the 4 questions and do the turn-arounds.
Notice and document when I seek approval when sharing my goals (goal shame). I plan to share them with trusted tribe before branching out further.
To counter cognitive dissonance, I’ve thought about what my peanut will tell me to “let me off the hook” regarding my commitments. I’m going to respond by telling the peanut I know what it’s doing and it’s not going to work anymore. I’m only going to listen to the things peanut tells me that serve me well. The rest are lies. Keep commitments. I also think it will help to have memories/experiences that evoke positive emotions that I can turn to when I need them. Do these make sense? Am I overcomplicating this?

How do I translate these into 2-week Do goals? Am I missing other techniques that would be more helpful? I feel like I need to work on getting more comfortable with feeling and fully processing negative emotion. Are there any specific exercise I can do to help with this? Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated!