How far is too far?

Someone told me that I hurt them, and I was completely unconscious to this until they told me. After receiving coaching on this topic, I realize that it’s their own thoughts that hurt them.

But how far is too far? What if you go around in the world and be mean or rude or genuinely hurt people? Is it really as simple as, “I didn’t hurt you, it’s just your thoughts about it”?

Thanks for your clarification!