How to accept where I am and process ‘not enough and graspiness’

After private coaching today I uncovered some interesting thoughts about experiencing lack mentality and feeling graspy and thought I’d just share all thoughts in one model… I guess if I just change 1 of them the others will fall to pieces? These are really dramatic.

C: Feeling grapsy in my marketing, right NOW before a consult on Wednesday and a big event for potential clients 13th of feb
T. It’s an indicator of my low level consciousness, because people who are grapsy are egoistic, self concerned, concerned about survival and therefore I must “still” be a very low level human
T: I should be more enlightened than feeling graspy
T: This means all the work I have done on myself has not worked because I am still a less than human
T: I can not have come very far in life because it’s a sign that I am needing and not trusting and thus operating from fear as only low level humans do
T: Marianne Williamson and Brooke don’t have lack mentality and I’ll never be like them
T: I should be enlightened enough to feel enough and NEVER feel not enoughness (graspiness)
T: I am going to be blocking myself at consults + the talk I am hosting
F: Fear, unworthiness, hopeless, sad
A: Deny all forms of pleasure and rest, focus on my not enoughness, not own my power, not focusing on all the ways I am good enough, not offer my help to people (in this model at least)
R: Not create enough safety to evolve ‘enough’ self acceptance to hold space for feeling graspy

By thinking this I suppose the pay off is a form of self punishment “I am a good human for at least being honest about how not enough I am.”

This is a loop that serves nobody. Please help.