How to have compassion for husband’s ex

I am working on having compassion for my husbands ex. The mother of his two daughters, 14 and 18.

She was driving 2x over the legal limit in a car accident that involved our youngest when she was 9. I believe she has a serious drinking problem. She is in denial and I think the girls so as well. Every time I see her I think of the accident and how irresponsible she is and resentment and for the most part just avoid any where that she will be and just don’t think about her and concentrate on my goals. I also worry about the girls.
C – ex wife
T – I wish the girls just live with us so we know they are safe
F – frustrated
A – ruminate. Spin, worry
R – nothing changes, I don’t reach my goals, my relationship with girls isn’t as connected as I would like.

Wondering about a new model I could have